Hi Rick,
Got a question for you. I’m in my 50’s and need to know.
As we know when men get a certain age they tend to loose their erection may it be by age, or a medical condition, or lack of desire but yet I’ve heard men say they are still sexually aroused. How can that be if they can’t have an erection??
I hope I’m not embarrassing anyone by asking this question but I’m curious just how a man feels sexually when an erection is not possible. Can you answer this question for me?
Brenda
Dear Brenda,
First of all, there are no embarrassing questions here. If you want to know, I’m sure many other women want to know the same thing.
As young men, having an erection and having sexual desires were pretty well tied together so I can understand your confusion. However, these are really two totally different things. To a man, this becomes more and more apparent as he passes through his forties and beyond. The E.D. (erectile dysfunction) that he begins to experience can be cause by a dozen different things. A drop in testosterone production, diabetes, lack of sleep, medications, stress, enlarged prostate, lack of exercise and many other things can lead to E.D. Of course, this can be very frustrating to both the man and his partner.
However, the sexual desire and arousal he experiences is created in his brain. It can be fueled by touch and smells and sounds and hormones and in a healthy male, usually sends blood pumping into his penis to create an erection. A man can be full of sexual desire, feelings of love, lust and a craving for his partner without ever attaining the erection that he would love to have. Obviously, this can cause him great frustration and embarrassment.
Mature couples usually find ways to have totally satisfying sex lives for as long as they live. Most have come to realize that “penetration” is only a small part good love-making. (but that subject is a book or two by itself). Of course, the first effort should be to find the cause of the E.D. and try to overcome it. In addition to getting healthy, sleeping, and choosing the right diet, there are specific exercises, massages and other natural techniques that can help. Try to resist the urge to take the easy way out by taking a pill. The new medications may be “wonder drugs” but they are expensive and obviously mask the real cause of the problem.
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